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Posted by on 1997 May 30 |

Cranial Explosions Frighten Hunters

(The Three Provinces: Ka’len 351)

The Tavern’s wench rubs a dirty rag across a stain on the teakwood bar. Her eyes look troubled and she looks up at you; her face seeking help.

"You look like a wise enough character," she says. "I’m a bit worried. Mayhap you could explain these strange events."

You nod in agreement and she inhales a great swallow of air and begins to tell her tale.

"Well, ya see, my beau, who’s a bit of an axwaddle, was out hunting in them goblin fields yesterday. His old man forced him to go out and bring some hog meat for dinner. Well, he finally came upon two hogs and he figgered that would please coot. Things was going great for him and he had the upper hand in the battle," she said with an air indicating her beau was not such a good fighter.

"When all o’ a sudden, a goblin jumped out o’ the bushes. Well, that scared my boyfriend half to death. In fact, he toppled over and dropped his sword and shield. Well, that filthy green-faced monster didn’t hesitate a bit. He walked over, put his sword to me beau’s adam’s apple, and began to push. Well, needless to say, me boyfriend was sweatin’ arrowheads and expected the worse. He closed his eyes preparin’ fer death, but then the pressure was released. He opened his eyes and all of a sudden, both o’ the hogs’ and the goblin’s head exploded! Just like that…"

***

Reports such as this one have been popping up all over the realms. Tales of people in the greatest danger saved by their foe’s cranial combustion. As of now, these events are unexplained.

There are many theories involving these combustions. Some blame them on the increased activities of the jadeite and kyanite gwethdusuans that are used to communicate telepathically.

Others believe that this is the work of Teiro, of course with rumors running rampant these days about the return of this elf necromancer, this will only add to the hysteria.
 

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Baresh started working at the Wren’s Nest when it first opened in 349AL. He’s been hearing the news and pouring drinks ever since then.